Building your family through surrogacy is a beautiful and deeply personal journey. For LGBTQIA+ parents, it often comes with unique considerations - from navigating country-specific legal frameworks, to choosing the right surrogacy agency, to deciding on donors or even exploring reciprocal IVF when surrogacy isn’t required.
I’m Olga Pysana, founder of The Surrogacy Insider. My mission is clear: I work exclusively for you - the intended parents.
I’m not an agency, I don’t represent surrogates, and I don’t run surrogacy programs.
Instead, I provide unbiased, independent guidance at the very start of your journey, helping you cut through the noise, avoid costly mistakes, and make clear, confident decisions about the path that’s right for you.
Do you know what a Surrogacy Consultant is? Find out now: Understanding Independent Surrogacy Consultants and How They Work
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Which countries currently (2O25 and 2O26) allow surrogacy for LGBTQIA+ intended parents?
The countries that are commonly reported to permit (or not expressly restrict) surrogacy for LGBTQIA+ intended parents are:
Proven Track Record - Guided 250+ families through successful international surrogacy journeys while leading a major global agency
Years of Dedicated Practice - Over 6 years specializing exclusively in cross border international surrogacy
Why Do LGBTQIA+ Intended Parents Need Guidance?
Surrogacy for same-sex couples and transgender parents shares many of the same medical steps as any surrogacy journey, but there are added layers of complexity.
Legal Recognition: Depending on your state or country, securing both parents’ names on a birth certificate can require pre-birth orders, second-parent adoptions, or other legal filings.
Genetic Choices: Gay male couples often decide whether one or both partners will contribute sperm. Lesbian couples may consider reciprocal IVF so both are biologically involved, eliminating the need for surrogacy. Trans parents may explore fertility preservation before or after transitioning.
Financial Planning: Costs are significant, ranging on average from $40,000 to $250,000. International programs can provide more budget-friendly alternatives. So, with the right guidance, intended parents can identify safe, reputable programs abroad while avoiding the pitfalls of hidden fees or misleading promises. Careful planning ensures you get the benefits of lower costs without unnecessary risks.
Agency Dynamics & Expectations: Navigating your relationship with an agency requires clarity and preparation. While agencies can provide structure and support, it’s important to maintain realistic expectations about what they will, and will not, handle. Understanding their role, potential limitations, and where independent guidance may still be needed can help you avoid misunderstandings and ensure a smoother experience.
Most agencies present their own solutions. My role is different. I provide clarity without bias. I help you understand the options, prepare for decisions, and connect you with the right professionals when you’re ready.
Have a first question in mind?
Send it to me using the contact form - I personally reply to every message.
Why Work With Me vs. An Agency Directly?
Working with me is very different from going directly to an agency because my only job is to help you understand the bigger picture before you commit to anything. Agencies present their own programs, their own countries, and their own version of what the journey should look like. That doesn’t mean they’re necessarily dishonest (although some are exactly that), but they naturally promote what they sell. Their perspective is limited to the countries in which they operate, the clinics they partner with, and the packages they offer.
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My perspective is wider.
I don’t represent any program, and I don’t need you to choose a particular country or agency or pathway. I’m here to help you understand how all the options compare, across jurisdictions, budgets, legal systems, ethical standards, and practical risks.
Instead of being guided toward one solution that may or may not be ideal, you get a clear, unbiased view of the landscape so you can decide what truly works for your family.
I also tell you the things agencies won’t tell you about themselves: the real wait times, the weak points in certain programs, where costs tend to rise, and which promises sound good in marketing but don’t hold up in practice.
My guidance exists to protect you from misinformation, unrealistic expectations, and expensive mistakes that usually happen early, long before you sign anything.
Working with me means you have someone who listens, understands your specific situation, and gives you honest feedback without trying to “close a sale.” You have one person to call, not a rotating team. You stay in control of decisions instead of being carried by a process you don’t fully understand. And when you eventually choose an agency, you enter that relationship informed, confident, and with your eyes fully open.
How I Support LGBTQ+ Intended Parents
Here’s what I do for LGBTQIA+ families:
Explaining the Process Clearly
From IVF basics to the legal landscape, I break everything down into understandable steps. No jargon, no overwhelm.
Destination Insights
I track the evolving international surrogacy landscape (laws, timelines, costs, ethics, risks and issues) and help you identify the safest and most strategic options for your LGBTQ+ family goals.
Reviewing Agency & Clinic Options
If you’re considering working with an LGBTQ+ friendly agency, I’ll help you read the fine print in their programs/contracts, compare fee structures, and spot red flags. You’ll feel empowered to choose the right partner, or pursue a more independent path if that suits you.
Financial Planning Support
I’ll walk you through typical costs, what’s usually included, and where LGBTQ+ families often overspend. Together, we’ll sketch out a realistic budget.
Legal Awareness
I’ll explain the importance of pre-birth orders, second-parent adoptions, and other protections LGBTQ+ intended parents need to know. Then I’ll connect you with lawyers who specialize in LGBTQ+ Surrogacy/Fertility Family law.
Emotional & Practical Coaching
From managing expectations to building healthy communication with your preferred agency, I help you prepare emotionally and practically for the road ahead.
Unique Solutions
Want something beyond standard agency packages, like a specific egg donor request, a particular destination, hybrid surrogacy or any custom setup? I have the right contacts to make it possible, always within the boundaries of legality and ethical practice.
Crisis Navigation
If your journey faces unexpected hurdles (legal shifts, destination closures, agency issues) I’ll help you pivot quickly with backup plans and alternative pathways.
Feeling overwhelmed?
Book your FREE consultation and let’s map your first steps together.
LGBTQ+ Surrogacy Journey & Timeline
Every journey is unique, but most LGBTQIA+ surrogacy experiences follow a similar structure.
Here’s what to expect:
1. Research and Contracts (3–4 months)
Choosing where to pursue surrogacy, and with whom, is one of the most important early decisions. I’ll help you compare destinations, review agency agreements, and evaluate package structures so you understand exactly what’s included, what’s extra, and what’s realistic. Together, we’ll make sure your choice is aligned with your goals, budget, and legal safety.
I always say it’s worth investing more time, focus, and resources here - because careful preparation at this stage can save you from costly mistakes later.
2. Medical Procedures (3 months)
For gay male couples, this often includes choosing an egg donor and creating embryos in the lab. Lesbian couples or trans parents may choose reciprocal IVF, donor sperm, or use preserved gametes which eliminates the need for surrogacy altogether.
3. Surrogate Matching & Achieving Pregnancy (3 months +)
With embryos ready, the next step is finding the right surrogate and moving toward embryo transfer. It’s important to know that pregnancy isn’t always achieved on the first attempt, sometimes more than one transfer is needed, or even a new round of embryo creation. This is a normal part of the process.
4. Pregnancy (~9 months)
Once pregnant, your surrogate carries the journey forward. You’ll receive regular updates from the agency, attend ultrasounds (in person or virtually), and share milestones.
This might be useful to read: Do surrogates get paid if they miscarry?
5. Legal Finalization
Depending on the destination, you may secure a pre-birth order during pregnancy or need a second-parent adoption after birth. I’ll help you understand your specific legal pathway and connect you with trusted experts to ensure both parents are fully recognized.
Altogether, a surrogacy journey typically takes 15–24 months from consultation to birth. My support is focused at the beginning - helping you research destinations, compare agencies, understand contracts, and set realistic expectations. With a solid foundation in place, you’ll move forward with clarity and confidence, avoiding many of the common roadblocks that can arise later.
Want a roadmap tailored to your situation? Ask me for my free step-by-step checklist during your consultation. Schedule it now!
Special Considerations for Transgender Parents
Surrogacy can be an affirming option for transgender individuals and couples. I ensure your path honors both your identity and your family-building goals.
Fertility Preservation: Before hormone therapy or surgery, options like sperm banking, egg freezing, or embryo creation can preserve future possibilities.
Reciprocal IVF: Some trans couples use reciprocal IVF so both partners are biologically involved, if medically possible, eliminating the need for surrogacy altogether.
Inclusive Care: I connect you with providers who understand trans healthcare and can provide respectful, affirming support.
Legally, trans parents often use the same tools as other LGBTQ+ families: pre-birth orders, second-parent adoptions, or parentage orders to ensure full parental recognition.
Are you a trans parent exploring surrogacy?
Check this article, it might help: Can Trans Women Get Pregnant?
FAQs
Laws vary greatly across countries. In some destinations, both parents can be recognized on the birth certificate from the start, while in others, only one parent may be listed initially and the second must secure rights through adoption or court proceedings in your home country. I’ll help you understand what recognition looks like in each destination, what steps you’ll need to take upon returning home, and connect you with trusted lawyers who specialize in international surrogacy and LGBTQ+ family law.
Depending on the destination, all intended parents or families typically spend anywhere from $40,000 to $250,000. Lower-cost programs are often found in countries with lower surrogate compensations, fewer legal protections or more limited medical infrastructure, while higher-cost destinations include extensive legal safeguards, insurance, and higher surrogate compensation. Your total will depend on the country, clinic, and agency you choose.
I’ll help you compare options, understand what’s included, and avoid unnecessary or hidden expenses.
On average, all surrogacy journeys take at least 15–24 months. This covers choosing a donor, creating embryos, matching with a surrogate and pregnancy.
Yes - but how depends on the destination. In some countries, both partners can attend appointments, be present at ultrasounds, and join in milestone updates. In others, legal or logistical restrictions may limit involvement to one parent. I’ll help you understand what’s possible in each location so you can set realistic expectations from the start.
Yes! Many LGBTQ+ couples use genetic material from both partners and then choose the best embryo for transfer.
Yes! In some countries, single parents can pursue surrogacy. In some countries, only female partners are allowed to start the surrogacy process, but in others, the surrogacy process is built not to exclude people based on gender or marital status.
You don’t need to be married to become parents through surrogacy, but the rules vary from country to country. Some countries recognise both partners as parents even without a marriage certificate, while others require marriage for the second parent to be legally added. In certain destinations, the genetic parent can be listed immediately, and the non-genetic parent completes a post-birth legal process such as a step-parent adoption or parental order.
What matters most is choosing a country where the laws are friendly to unmarried and same-sex couples and where the parentage pathway is predictable. This is something I help families understand early, because the difference between two countries can be the difference between a very smooth legal process and months of unnecessary complications.
So yes, it’s absolutely possible, you just need to choose the right jurisdiction and plan the legal steps clearly from the beginning.
If your home country doesn’t recognise both LGBTQ+ parents, the genetic parent is typically recognised first, and the non-genetic parent completes a legal process such as adoption or a parental order. These steps are common and planned in advance so both parents can gain full legal rights.
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Book consultation with independent surrogacy advisor
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Determine your budget range
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Research legal requirements in your home country
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Compare 3-5 potential destinations
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Review agency contracts before signing
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Yes! Both partners can contribute sperm. Embryos can be created from each partner’s sample, and you can choose not to know which one results in the pregnancy if that’s what feels right for your family. However, transferring embryos from different genetic contributors to a single surrogate is not always permitted in all countries, so it’s important to confirm local regulations before proceeding.
Yes. Each partner can create embryos using their own sperm, allowing you to have children biologically related to one partner and others related to the other. Many LGBTQ+ couples choose this approach to build a family that reflects both partners biologically.
You can use a known egg donor, whether it’s a friend or family member, as long as the clinic and country allow it. She’ll go through the same medical and psychological screenings as any donor, and legal agreements are essential to protect everyone’s roles and intentions.
If you’re planning to transition and want the option of having biological children later, it’s safest to preserve your eggs or sperm before starting hormone therapy. Hormones can affect fertility over time, and while some changes may be reversible, there’s no guarantee. Freezing your eggs or sperm early gives you the most reliable chance of using your own genetics in the future, no matter what steps you take in your transition.
In most cases, you don’t need to disclose your trans status to the surrogate or agency unless it directly affects the medical or legal aspects of your journey. What matters to clinics is your current medical history, hormone use, and any information needed for safe treatment, not your identity. However, for the purposes of international surrogacy, any official documents, such as passports or ID need to accurately match the information provided.
That said, full privacy is always respected, and many trans parents choose to share only what is medically relevant. Agencies and surrogates are used to working with LGBTQ+ families, and your identity alone is not something that disqualifies or complicates your journey.
No. Surrogacy isn’t inherently more expensive for LGBTQ+ couples.
What can change the cost is the medical plan, not the identity of the parents. For example, if you need donor eggs, create embryos for both partners, or do additional genetic testing, those steps add costs for any family, LGBTQ+ or not. The base surrogacy program itself is the same price regardless of your orientation.
Stay Connected With Me
You don’t have to walk this journey alone. Stay in touch and find support:
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Join my Facebook Community - meet other LGBTQIA+ intended parents and learn from shared experiences.
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Follow me on Instagram (@thesurrogacyinsider) - I share tips, stories, and behind-the-scenes guidance.
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Use the Contact Form - no question is too small, and I personally reply.
Together, we’ll create a roadmap that fits your goals and values. Let’s turn the dream of parenthood into reality — on your terms, with independent guidance you can trust.
